EH S3 E17 : Special Thanksgiving all-Boid Issue (no ducks)
the trump administration gives america the bird....
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OM*G! what are the odds of this happening to you whilst out birdwatching with your buddy? the landed bird was heard to mumble something like "i finally found you you MF!!! you're way behind on your child support!"
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Breaking with a longstanding Thanksgiving tradition, on Monday Donald J. Trump refused to pardon the White House turkey after it failed to offer him an appropriate bribe.
“That turkey could have invested in Eric and Don Jr.’s crypto scams or given me a gold-plated 747, but it chose not to,” he said. “That turkey is a terrible person.”
Trump emphasized “the many great things I have done for turkeys,” including “making the price of them go up forty percent.”
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from andy b:
Stuck with MAGA relatives around the table today? Gaslight them by pretending you’re a convert to their movement! Just slip these surefire talking points into the conversation:
I’m more grateful for this Thanksgiving meal than last year’s because it cost so much more.
I agree with RFK Jr.—polio’s not so bad.
Pete Hegseth has made me feel so much better about my drinking.
I’m grateful to live in a country where if you’ve committed violent crimes and gone to prison you can still get a job working for ICE.
After we’re done eating, let’s tear down this house and build a ballroom.
Thank God Trump is deporting all those undocumented workers! If I want fruit and vegetables I’ll just pick them myself.
Say what you will about Trump, he’s a loyal friend—look at how many times Epstein mentioned him in his emails.
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ELDER HOSTILE HAS THE BEST COVERAGE OF TODAY'S TAKEOVER. NO ONE ELSE COMES CLOSE.
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do you want to know how the story ends?

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